Newlyweds need help and lots of it.
Couples spend nearly 30 grand, on average, on their Big Day! And June is one of the two most popular month for weddings. Stats were from the WSJ.
The focus seems askew.
The music, Scripture readings, bridesmaids’ dress color, flowers, food, photography, invitations, programs – these are carefully considered and decided.
Yet most engaged couples give little thought on how they’ll live as husband and wife. How will the newlyweds succeed in marriage after they leave the reception? How can the live beyond the glory of their wedding day and have a God-honoring marriage their first year and all the years till death do they part?
They need wisdom, prayer, and encouragement.
How to Help Newlyweds: Wisdom
Among the greatest gifts family, friends, and biblical counselors can bestow on the couple is wisdom.
“The beginning of wisdom is this:
And whatever you get, get insight,
Prize her highly, and she will exalt you:
She will honor you if you embrace her” (Pr. 4:7-8, ESV).
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, the wise King Solomon shared. With reverential fear of the triune God, a couple will have a godly marriage. To help them on their wisdom journey:
First, help them see themselves as “one flesh.” Openly discuss this verses with them in truth and love.
- “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” (Gen. 2:24, ESV).
- “’This (one flesh) mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband” (Eph. 5:31-32, ESV).
Second, work through a Christ-centered marriage material with them and share your own ups and downs of marriage. Here’s a helpful resource is improving biblical communication.
How to Help Newlyweds: Prayer
The apostle Paul urged believers to “pray at all times” (Eph. 6:18) and to “devote yourselves to prayer” (Col. 4:2). In today’s assault on marriage, married folks – whether newlyweds or couples celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary – need to pray: for one another and for other married couples.
In his classic work Purpose in Prayer, nineteenth-century pastor E.M. Bounds reminded us of the importance of meaningful prayer:
Prayer is not a meaningless function or duty to be crowded into the busy or the weary ends of the day, and we are not obeying our Lord’s command when we content ourselves with a few minutes upon our knees in the morning rush or late at night when the faculties, tired with the tasks of the day, call out for rest.
God is always within call, it is true; His ear is ever attentive to the cry of His child, but we can never get to know Him if we use the vehicle of prayer as we use the telephone, for a few words of hurried conversation. Intimacy requires development.
Pray continually, earnestly, specifically, and with sensitivity to the problems and needs of others, especially newlyweds.
How to Help Newlyweds: Encouragement
All couples need encouraging words: “Your marriage inspires me.” “I know you went through a tough time, and your marriage is even stronger now.” “You two still hold hands after all these years. . .How wonderful!”
Sometimes a couple’s marriage needs restoration.
Did you know Biblical Counseling Center has helped hundreds of married couples through their difficulties and find renewal in their relationship with each other and with God? Here’s important information on marriage counseling with BCC.