Your Talk Reveals Your Heart

Dr. Lucy Ann MollFor Those Giving Help, For Those Seeking HopeLeave a Comment

What you say not only reveals your heart, it also exposes what you think about God! This article by Lucy Ann Moll, D.Min. candidate appeared first here and is used with permission. 

Did you know what you say and how you say it reveal a lot about you? And your talk also reveals what you think of God? Your communication exposes your heart.

For the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart. Matthew 12:34, NASB

As in water face reflects face, so a man’s heart reveals the man. Proverbs 27:19, NKJV

As a man thinks in his heart, so is he. Proverbs 23:7, NLT

Here’s a time I handled communication poorly. My talk revealed fear and pride in my heart. The family member: my dad’s wife.

A while back, she stomped into a restaurant where my dad and I were enjoying a late lunch, and her words stabbed me like daggers: “Why are you here with him? He should be home with the children. You just want his money.”

Defensively, I said, “The children are young adults. And I’m here to see my dad, not get money.” He tried to quiet her and I moseyed toward the hostess at the cash register.

My communication showed I was most concerned about me. I was self-protective. I felt embarrassed. Notice the emphasis on the pronoun I. My talk exposed my fear and pride and selfishness.

Your Talk Reveals Your Beliefs

how to talk like JesusYour heart is highly important to God. Think of it as the control center of your being. It reveals your beliefs and your motivations, including your beliefs about God.

What you believe guides your thoughts and actions. God cares about your communication because he cares about you and your beliefs.

He desires your focus to be on Jesus, not on yourself. When your beliefs are “me-centered,” you’ll show them by what you say and what you do. A “me-centered” heart is prideful, selfish, lonely, angry, fearful, and sad, and such is your communication.

Did you know that the Bible says if a person can control their tongue, they’ll be able to control all their desires/passions/affections?

For we all stumble in many ways. If anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to bridle the whole body as well. James 3:2, NASB

How to Talk Well

Dr. Stuart Scott, an author and a professor at the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, shares prerequisites to good communication in his book The Exemplary Husband. Here are two of them.

  1. To talk more like Jesus, you must want to please God more that anything else. Ask God for help in desiring to please him more than you want to have your own way or to be right. Desire to know him as he reveals himself in Scripture.

    For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ. Galatians 1:10, ESV

  2. To talk more like Jesus, you must be humble. The opposite of humility is pride. When you choose to communicate humbly, your words and your nonverbal communication will demonstrate patience. If you’re humble you’ll be patient when you’ve been misunderstood. You’ll lovingly speak truthfully, and you’ll listen much more than you talk.

Make It Practical!

To help improve your communication, choose this week to do two things:

First, do not interrupt when someone else is speaking. Instead, listen.

Second, when you’re talking, pause once in a while, so the other person has a chance to speak.

What has helped your improve your communication? Leave a comment, please.

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